I don't know how most people experience love and life. Mine seems to have been somewhat unconventional. When I was younger, I lived for love and love met everything. Now there is no love left, but here I continue to live on. When I was young, I did not think I would live to be an adult, and I didn't really. I no longer resemble anything of my former self. I died awhile back. Now I avoid humanity like the plague (and they pretty much are). I know, I know, so pessimistic, Debbie Downer. For you young people that is a reference to Satuday Night Live (Old School).
Anyway, as I was saying love ruled my life and now has no place in it. What does it mean to really be alive? I don't think I qualify, and it is hard to care one way or the other.
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